Barely Holding it Together

Hellooooooo!

How is it March already?

Ever since I started freelancing, I’ve been tracking my income with just one goal in mind: to earn more than the previous month.

I was actively looking for work, keeping my pipeline strong. Inbound inquiries were consistent, and whenever things felt out of control, I picked up smaller, one-time projects to make it a successful month.

Until October.

A personal loss hit me in ways I never expected, affecting my work like never before.

Since I already had clients and an active pipeline, I made it through the last quarter decently. But after that, everything went downhill.

Here’s a visual representation for you.

When the new year started and I thought I was doing better, life became slightly more shittier. My self-esteem sank so low that I genuinely believed I wouldn’t be able to get back up again.

With the precious gems of friends I have left, I found the strength to stand up—only to be knocked down again in mid-February when I realized I had truly lost something I’d regret for all for life.

And just like that, life pushed me into another month, carrying more self-hatred than I ever imagined.

February was supposed to be better. Since that didn’t happen, I am looking at March with fresh eyes.

Because ‘life goes on and on and on and on and…’

As leaves fall from trees with the change in seasons, I hope to shed these feelings and welcome new energy as spring approaches.

Income Update:

January: ₹28,284
February: ₹21,100 (I took a whole week off)

The $5000/month challenge I set at the start of the year is still there. But right now, I don’t have the mental or physical energy to actively chase it.

This newsletter has always been my safe space, to share ideas, failures, feelings, and the ups and downs of working in something as uncertain as freelancing.

I had thought about slowly transitioning this newsletter to be more ICP-centered, sharing writing tips, behind-the-scenes insights, and lessons from my process. But that would mean being more ‘professional’—and kinda restricted.

So, last month, I started another newsletter (on Substack, just to explore how it compares to Beehiiv) called Fully Content.

It was supposed to be a temporary name, but it’s growing on me.

Here’s the idea behind it:

Fully Content as in “All About Content” and “Fully Satisfied”.

We already have five editions published, and I have so many ideas to make this as valuable as possible.

Give it a read! Ideas, suggestions, and improvements (for both work and life) are always appreciated.

See you next Friday!

Love,
Nikita